Money and Jesus: Part 1

"I hate money," proclaims Jo March, heroine of Little Women (and of bookish young girls everywhere).

Her sister is sick, her father is away fighting the Civil War, and her mother needs an expensive train ticket to fetch the doctor. Admirable, spontaneous Jo does what many a Civil War-era heroine did when faced with an expense too great to pay out of pocket: she sells her hair.

This leads to the best line in the whole movie (Little sister Amy, upon seeing the shorn Jo: "But Jo, your one beauty!"), but it is Jo's first proclamation that makes my point today. Oh, money. How difficult you are.

My husband and I have been graduate students, on and off, for the past five years. One of my favorite Wheaton professors was fond of saying, "The nice thing about staying in graduate school is that you get really good at being poor."

This is true. We're almost rocket-scientists when it comes to finding deals (there's a $4 movie theater on the other side of town!) or saving money (cooking without meat 4-5 days a week can save a bundle). We get tips from other grad-school friends and family who are also quite adept (and often even MORE adept) at making ends meet when those ends are quite short to begin with.

We certainly haven't suffered during our graduate school years - family and friends been exceedingly (almost ridiculously) generous and we've budgeted carefully and thoughtfully. We also aren't grumpy about our state of affairs. We love learning and ideas, and this is the path we've chosen for a reason. Investment banking just doesn't have the same siren call, to us!

Still, having less money usually means being inconvenienced. We won't starve, certainly. But we'll wait at the airport three hours for a ride instead of paying for a cab ($60!!!). We'll wait until Monday to go to the Urgent Care clinic with a bad sore throat instead of going to the Emergency Department on a Saturday ($$$$$!!!). We take walks together for dates and get our books from the library. A real splurge is a night at Maggiano's or Outback. Concerts are largely a thing of the past. We stay with friends whenever we can while traveling (which has the added bonus of fun visits on top of staying in our budget).

Our premarital counselors told us that God usually gives every couple one person who is the "gas pedal" and one who is the "brake" when it comes to spending money. This can (obviously) cause some conflict.

I'll admit that I am the gas pedal in our relationship. Yet, my ability to spend money really quickly is not always because I'm generous. Usually it's because I don't handle much of the budgeting, so I don't know what we'll be sacrificing if I splurge on an item. I don't usually want to spend tons of money on myself (though cute clothes can be tempting, to say the least...), but I do want to give it away. I want to buy the BEST wedding gift. I want to put a thousand dollars in the offering plate. I want to buy out Baby Gap for my cute little nieces. When friends come for dinner I want to cook steak, darn it, and not the cheap kind.

Daryl (luckily) is a bit wiser. He is our brake pedal. He's the one who asks if we really need something, or if we just want it. He helps weigh price and convenience against budget and savings. Though sometimes (as he'll readily admit), he can brake too much. We're learning to balance. We're learning to give. We're learning to save. We're learning to be wise.

I've been challenged in my thinking about money this summer. For one thing, I'm staying with my parents up in Wisconsin (read: no rent payments for a few months and lots and lots of meals for which we don't pay). It's an incredible gift. It's amazing. It's restful. And it's given me some space to relax and think about money in a way other than, "Oh goodness, we MUST STICK TO THE BUDGET OR WE WILL HAVE NO SHOES AND NO FOOD!!!"

I don't want my relationship with money to be one of fear. I don't want to hate it, like Jo. I also don't want to love it, as that can obviously lead to all sorts of problems. What I really want is to treat it as another aspect of living life under the power and grace of Jesus. The Lord of the universe is Lord over my wallet, my bank account, and my desire for a new pair of shoes, too.

Some good friends of our family teach at churches and conferences about stewardship. Recently they've started keeping a log of all the ways God has blessed them financially through family, friends, gifts, and surprises. This is admirable, and it's something Daryl and I have started to do. It's so easy in the middle of a financial drain (a crazy vet bill, a dental crown, graduate school) to feel suffocated. How will we make it through this? Now we have something tangible to look at, to see where God has cared for us in the past, and will certainly care for us in the future.

But here's the crazy thing about these friends: Not only do they keep a record of these bountiful gifts; they tithe off of them.

That means if their church sends them on a camping trip that would have costed, oh, $400 for their family of five, they put $40 in the offering plate. If someone were to donate a car worth $5,000, then $500 would go in. This is so incredibly brave and full of faith that it almost scares me to think about, especially coming from a graduate school budget.

I don't think that this is the solution for everyone when learning to be a good steward of what God has given, but it does give me pause.

For this family, tithing is worship. For Daryl and I it is often either blind giving (Daryl does most of our budgeting, so when I'm tempted to be crazily-generous in the offering plate, it's often because I don't count the cost, which isn't really generosity as much as it is randomness) or fearful giving. I want our tithing to be an act of worship. I want to give to God because of what God has bountifully given to us, even if our piggy banks feel light.

*Image borrowed from: http://ingridgraceandaudrey.blogspot.com/2008/09/re-let-it-be-love3.html

Ten on Tuesday (Take Five-ish)

Today's Ten on Tuesday (that, yes, is being posted on Monday, but my Tuesday will be quite busy!) will have a vocational theme, since this is what's on my mind these days. As a Candidate in the PCUSA, I am near the end of the ordination process. My dream of all dreams is to receive a call as a pastor, to spend my days serving God and the church with all that I am. Lord willing, if goes well ("if the way be clear" is the official Presbyterian phrase often used here) I will be certified as ready for ordination at the end of March. Once I'm certified, I can officially look for a "call" (Presbyterian-ese for "pastoral job"). And this makes me excited and nervous and hopeful and excited.

This is me in my university chaplain internship days. I miss these students! I run into some of them when I'm teaching, but I miss hanging out with them all week and leading Bible studies. They're incredible, incredible folks.

So in honor of the call/job search that I am currently beginning to embark upon, I will answer the following ten vocational questions:

1. What is the best job you've ever had?
 I've had a lot of "best" jobs, but they were great in different ways. I loved, loved, loved working at Wheaton College's rock climbing wall. I taught students and staff how to climb and belay, set new routes on the wall, and (when I wasn't doing either of those two things), hung around and talked about climbing all day. It rocked. Pun intended.

The job that was best for my personal growth was my summer CPE (Clinical Pastoral Education) internship. I worked as a hospital chaplaincy intern, and in three months it really felt like I saw it all. Brand new life, miraculous recoveries, incredible suffering, death, grief. Injuries that I didn't know were possible (did you know that it's possible for your legs and various other parts of your body to fill up with fluid and swell up to four or five times their original size?! Me neither, before this summer. Eep.) CPE is structured with prayer, reflection, chaplaincy work, debriefing, and supervisory sessions. It's a crucible, that's for sure, but with the right supervisors it's also an incredible and transforming experience. It wore me out at times, but I loved it.

I was a bar pianist back home in Eagle River. That was a blast. It got hilarious later in the evening when people had had several drinks with dinner and would request things I had just played. "I haven't thought of this song in years and years, but would you play 'Misty'?" Uh... sure. Just like I did six minutes ago? But I got free chocolate cake (mmmm... the BEST chocolate cake), nice tips, and an excuse to wear fancy dresses on top of it all. It was SO fun.

2. Have you ever had an internship?
I have had four internships. FOUR. One editorial internship at a rock climbing magazine in Colorado (fun, fun, fun) and three ministry related internships. I've enjoyed them all and learned a great deal, but I'm ready to be a non-intern for a change. Here's to the end of interning and the beginning of working jobs that last longer than an academic year or a summer! Hooray!!! 


3. What is the worst job you've ever had?
I worked at an office furniture company for a summer years ago. It was a great company and the people (including my boss) were really amazing, but the job itself would have perfectly fit someone with the exact opposite personality traits that I have. It was a position for an extroverted, non-type-A, incredibly flexible, very organized person. I am an introverted, not particularly organized, relatively type-A, and very focused person. It did not go well.


4. What kind of boss will you be (or are you, if you already supervise others)?
A good one, I hope. The pastor I interned with a few summers ago and my CPE supervisors are my models for this. Under their leadership I always felt like I had great gifts to offer the world.

5. How many jobs have you ever worked at one time?
Oh goodness... Last year at seminary I was a full-time seminary student (I certainly count this as a job), a university chaplain intern (10-12 hours per week), a teaching assistant at the seminary (10-ish hours per week), and an adjunct professor at a nearby university (10-ish hours per week). Needless to say, Daryl did 99% of the housework AND cooked me a lot of dinners. I believe my entire household duties were as follows: 1) Feed the cats. 2) Load and unload the dishwasher. By November Daryl took over feeding the cats, too. Love that man.

6. What is a job you would be worst at?
Anything that involved hurtling through space at high speeds. Astronaut, circus performer, ski jumper. Also, anything involving higher, higher math. Nuclear physicist, NASA engineer, etc.

7. What is a job you aren't currently pursuing that you'd be good at?
I think I could be a really great gluten-free bakery owner. I love to bake, and I'd love to give people who can't eat gluten the joy of eating a gluten-free but incredibly yummy cupcake or cookie or even wedding cake. It's hard to truly understand gratitude until you've fed a gf baked good to a gf-er. They might kiss you.

8. What was your first job?
Cleaning chalets at Zaugg's resort. I can now say that I cleaned the cabins that belonged to the resort of the parents of Jinelle Zaugg-Siergiej, Olympic silver medalist. Woot.

9. What's your most marketable attribute?
Pastorally, my preaching and pastoral care skills. Teaching-wise, my strong student evaluations. As a chaplain, my ability to think quickly on my feet and not overreact to any perceived craziness/medical disaster.

10. Are you good at job interviews? 
Usually. Unless I get really, really nervous, and then I can say stupid things by accident. When a member of the admissions staff at Wheaton College interviewed me as a high school senior (granted, this was not a job interview, but still...) I was totally unprepared. I wasn't expecting the call, and I got really flustered. Then the woman asked me what I liked to do for fun. My response? "Well, I sometimes skip school to go snowboarding..." Well done, Courtney. Well done.

What about you all? Best job? Worst one? Job prospects for the future? Gratitude for a great current job? Spill!

Snow Day Take Two: Dream House Edition I

Well, I'm snowed in again. This isn't as fun as it would be on, say, a Monday, since I don't have any classes or work today anyway. Just lots of reading, editing, and studying. But it is fun to look out the window and see everyone's cars buried.

In honor of the snow day, and the soon-to-come celebration Daryl and I are planning when we're officially back together (hint: it may involve Disneyland), I've decided to start looking at pictures of rooms and decorations, in hopes of planning the colors and ideas of the new place we'll live in Nashville. We're not sure yet if it will be an apartment or a small house, but we do know three things:

1) We will be painting the walls. All of them. Beautiful colors. After four years living in campus dorms and houses at Wheaton, one year in an apartment building that didn't allow painting, and three years in Princeton Seminary housing, we are sick of white walls. They make us feel institutionalized. And sad. And bored. My life needs COLOR, and lots of it.

2. The place we live will have good natural light. This is Daryl's only requirement. He loves light like a mouse loves cheese. He needs light like bacon needs eggs. The man's a natural light-loving fiend.

3. There will be a washer and dryer. Washing and drying clothes will not involve hiking down to a mold-infested, flooded basement full of spiders and insects. This is my only requirement (other than the painting).

We don't plan to buy much additional furniture, as we're pretty well stocked in that department. So in the spirit of using what we have and designing something beautiful, I've found these photos depicting interesting and beautiful rooms using our basic furniture:


Living room:

These are actually our exact couches. I love the warm gold walls with the red  couches, the beautiful colors of art on the back wall (though Daryl might nix the flowers and go for something more abstract), and the dark end tables. The curtains are beautiful, too, and I hope to be able to sew something like that soon. I wouldn't have thought to put the light-colored rug under the table, but I kinda like it. I'd either use that or the current rug we have with deeper browns, reds, and greens in it.









Bathroom:

 I know, I know, we probably won't have a super-modern-looking bathroom like this. But here I'm more interested in the color choices. After living with a bright pink bathroom (all the married apartments have them...) with several colors of pink (tile, tub, etc.), I'm about colored out in the bathroom department. I want the bathroom to be clean, simple, and soothing. When I wake up at 6am, grouchy and groggy, and stumble to the shower, I want it to communicate that this day will be okay. Also, I love the pale blue and tan. It feels like a spa to me.




The next edition will involve bedrooms and kitchens... Stay tuned...

Photos borrowed from c-thruwindows.com and terryfrank.net.